Last night I shared an article that was written by another girl in my writing group. I absolutely loved it and you can read it here if you’d like. Usually I ignore negative comments on posts. People are allowed to make assumptions and have opinions and so forth. When I wrote a funny lemons to lemonade type article about my kid getting lice, people took my vague journal entry as literal lice advice and proceeded to question me as a parent and human. I found it hysterical. This particular comment on this particular article however really got my attention. It wasn’t even on my page or on something I’d written, but I could not get it out of my mind. The comment was:
“Maybe leave God out of the STD talk.”
If you don’t know me very well let me go ahead and let you know that I am not naïve to the fact that not everyone in the world believes in, lives for, or serves God. I know not everyone takes the Bible as truth or Jesus as the Son of God. This isn’t a thing where I am suddenly stunned and upset that the world is broken; I know that, and as much as it sucks, it isn’t shocking to me. The reason this stuck with me so much is because I see the Christian culture doing this all too often when it comes to this particular topic and that is both sad and scary.
I know many born again believers who love Jesus and pursue Him in some areas of their lives, yet they leave God out of their sexual decisions. I know teenagers who are in church more each week than I am and we have conversations that prove their desire to please and obey the Holy Spirit, yet they ignore what He says about sleeping with their boyfriends. I have friends who live with their significant other despite not sharing a last name yet. I know married couples who make porn a normal part of their sex life.
I hesitate to even write this because I am the farthest thing from perfect ever. I know people will immediately cry hypocrite because it will be very easy for them to think of a list of sins that I commit, but I am ok with that. My point of this article isn’t to finger point back and forth about who does what sin- I’ll save everyone the time and point out right now that I sin daily with what comes out of my mouth; my reactions to things can be downright ugly, and I really, really like things my way. I don’t think I’ll wake up tomorrow perfect so I’m not expecting anyone else too either. My discomfort over the comment and my point in writing this article is this- it is a very dangerous step that we take when we decide to leave God out of anything. God is right in the middle of my sins with me every day. Every time He points it out to me and I repent (again). There is no area of my life where I have decided to not allow God access, and never once have I surrendered to just keep doing certain sins. It may look like I have, but I promise I’m trying, and God knows that. There is a difference in struggling with certain sins vs deciding something sinful is ok. If you’re struggling with sexual sin, I’m so sorry. I pray that you’ll continue to repent and heal and find victory. If you’ve decided your sexual sin is ok, I pray you’d change your mind and actions before destruction comes. If sexual sin is a part of your past, I pray you’d find the immediate grace and forgiveness that Christ gives when you give it over to Him.
As a parent, I cannot fathom talking to my daughter about sex one day and leaving God out of it. He has so much to say about it. He has so much to say about marriage and her body and her value and forgiveness and family, and it all relates back to sex somehow. My sister, brother, husband, and I are leading a purity retreat in a few weeks, and as I read this comment last night I thought “what if we just left God out of the purity retreat.” I honestly can’t even imagine. If we weren’t going to share any of His thoughts then all we’d be left with is our own, and that’s just scary. Abbie’s view of sex apart from Jesus Christ isn’t something anyone needs to send their kid to listen to. I am so thankful that I have the privilege of bringing God into the sex talk with my children one day because that’s the only way they have any kind of chance at doing things the godly way and in turn living their best life. I’m glad my parents made it about Christ and His love for me and not something as fickle as their own opinions, the opinions of culture, or my teenage wisdom.
As parents I don’t think that there can be any area of our lives where God is deemed unwelcome. I’m not saying you must listen to Christy Nockels 24/7 and have a gong that gets pounded every hour to remind you to open up the bible and then hit your kid over the head with it. But the minute you decide there is an area of your life or your child’s life that God needs to be left out of, I personally think it is a very dangerous place to put yourself and your family, and the consequences could be very sad. I love my daughter way too much to leave God out of anything regarding her. I fear myself way too much to leave God out of anything regarding me.
So, to the lady who wrote that comment who is probably oblivious to the fact that you sparked a blog entry from me because of it, I’m not mad at ya, but I won’t be leaving God out of anything. I need Him all up in the middle of everything I do especially regarding my kid if I even want a shot at her turning out ok. I pray she remains pure and values herself and her Savior and her future husband (if marriage is in God’s plan for her) enough to make that a priority. I pray she knows that God’s love for her and her salvation aren’t dependent upon her purity, but that she never takes advantage of such grace. I pray she’ll know the unwavering forgiveness that her daddy and I, and Jesus, have waiting for her but that she’ll never need it in this area of her life. I pray she sees her daddy and me and desires that kind of closeness/security one day and gives it to the man God has for her. I pray she never, ever deems any area of her life an area in which God isn’t needed or welcome. I pray that purity is never her ultimate goal, but that closeness with the Father is (resulting in her purity naturally falling into place).
Maybe don’t leave God out of the STD talk, or any talk for that matter. This family won’t be.
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